To Fear or Not To Fear
Dear Fellow Earth Destroyer User (or Occupant),
In the 90s, there were a lot of Nigerian horror movies supposed to make us super religious, careful of who we eat from or mix with and watchful for the end of the world. This sparked a lot of fear. At least, I know that as a child who watched Full moon, I had scary dreams of Regina Askia and full moons. Two or three decades later, the end of the world hasn’t come, and the fear is barely here. But it should be, and I’ll tell you why.
On Wednesday night, I passed by the military barrack where my grandfather's funeral reception was held and fear gripped me. It's strange, I should've thought of Chinese rice and itchy lace fabrics. When I pass by Atan cemetery, where he was buried, I never think of death or feel any fear. Instead, there's an unmistakable calm I feel. This morning, I realised I was only scared because of the current clime in the world, Africa, Nigeria, Lagos.
We all know about the xenophobic killings in South Africa and the events that came after. It’s stressful that this is happening in the 21st century, but you see, there’s no time cap on inhumane behaviour. I'm learning this the hard way. Humans have been shit since the time of the caveman or Adam, and we'll probably still be shit when robots completely take over. I wrote a shitload [read ranted] more about this -- my emotions, my fears, etc -- but I cut it short. Fear is mostly useless; my emotions mean nothing in the grand scheme of things. Yet it's unavoidable, we feel things and sometimes, that's all the push we need. I had a conversation with my journalist friend, Tosin, and he said, when you're reporting on so and so or so and so (think of the worst human experiences) all the time, it's bound to make you depressed at some point. What about when it's all you see around you? There's so much happening right now in the world. I almost titled this letter The World is Burning. You should read about the Amazon fires and climate change, and about Hong Kong and Mali. You should look around your immediate environment: the poor are killing the middle class, men are killing women, South Africans are killing Nigerians, etc. We might as well be scared because, yes the world is burning, and it's only a matter of time before it gets to your doorstep.
After almost a year, I published this short story I wrote in Chimamanda’s workshop in November 2018. I hope it makes you laugh.
This week was bad and good. I spent a lot of time being sad (I have a cold etc.), being happy, working hard so that I didn't have to be sad and listening to podcasts! This weekend, all I want to do is sleep, and sleep I shall.
Till the next Thoughts Day! Have a super, super week!